Seeds

from Seeds by Meyer Pax

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lyrics

It shouldn't be this hard
It never meant that much to you anyway
But 12 months, 2 weeks, or 18 days
Is too long to keep the "not" in your brain

Where were you
The countless weekends I spent by the phone
Counted sheep until the morning showed
Planted plans but they were never grown

That's changed
You say I've changed
I say you've changed

I've been searching for an answer
In constants in decimals in open signs
In something that's always been by my side
Though I never had the will to make it mine

Longing to stand here
After another year alive
Just longing to stand for something
To prove it's worth your while
To prove it's worth the drive
To prove it's worth your time
For proof, for proof, for proof
That we're all longing to feel alive

That's changed
You say I've changed
I say you've changed
We've stayed the same

I wish you could see how much I've grown
Who I am and who I'm going to be
I wish you could see what I've become
What these last few years have made me

Because I just need a friend tonight

I need a vial of validation
a set of sight sacrosanct
Left the holy from my heartland
in the earthquake of your absence
I broke ground to ashes, phoenician
Colorblind of sunken eyes, I slathered
in the memory of your yellow red rosy
Colored glass houses, the stones shatter the sunsets

The EMS was chemical based,
The heart of this city beats under high pressure
Washed facades with futures that will never come to pass
That you'll never come to pass by
this melancholy metropolis
that you'll never see the wholesome growth of elegy
of orienting the fleur de lis, cordially, drinking, morality tapestry
Woven into frozen carbon

But the diamonds here are shattered shards
Remnants of dust colored daylights far gone
The hurt still lives on but the foundation is fine
I built this world in your stead forgotten that it would live beyond your time

What's another year alone
When there's no one in this town but your ghost?

credits

from Seeds, released August 13, 2020

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Meyer Pax Flagstaff, Arizona

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